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I lost my job at the bank on the very first day. A woman asked me to check her balance. So I pushed her over.
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That’s very good. Instantly on the daily joke list.
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I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.
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I bought a racehorse recently and decided to name him My Face.
I don’t actually care if he wins any race, I just want to hear a bunch of posh twats screaming “Come on My Face!”
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I was late to work the other day and the boss said “you should have been here at 8:30”
I said “Why? what happened at 8:30?”
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