The thread for jokes that don’t meet Flobs’ exacting standards

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Been soaking a bit long, no?

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Three women are about to be executed for crimes they committed. One’s a brunette, one’s a redhead, and one’s a blonde.

Two guards brings the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready… Aim…” Suddenly the brunette yells,

“Earthquake!” Everyone is startled and looks around. She manages to escape.

The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready… Aim…” The redhead then
screams, “Tornado!” Yet again, everyone is startled and looks around. She too escapes execution.

By this point, the blonde had figured out what the others did and knew exactly what she needed to do. The guards bring her forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.

She also says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready… Aim…”

The blonde shouts, “Fire!”

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Why did the transgender man only eat salad?

Spoiler

Because he was a her before.

https://twitter.com/nocontexthumans/status/1661816357380390913?s=61&t=CHnRQ3uRWoyAgq-tzUnftA

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That’s bollocks.

Hd Reaction GIF by MOODMAN

Same energy

Can everyone please stop milking it?

OMG… Discovered this morning in the toilets at a motorway services…!
It is a bigger diameter than the bend it is supposed to be flushed around…
C’mon… any of our posters travelling by car today that needed an urgent call of nature - Own up :0))

Mods please remove or pixelate if deemed unsuitable for thread :0)

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Bloody hell.

Not sure if that would leave you laughing, crying or praying to Jesus Christ? :rofl:

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