Shouldn’t that be Keith Richard, not Chuck?
Not according to #ChuckNorrisFacts
Cool. I’ll check that out.
I was, of course, just referring to idea that Keith Richards is friggin’ ancient
Today a man with a stutter was convicted and sentenced to prison for life, but his victims are worried that he won’t finish his sentence
Sometimes the funniest ones are just the plain old typos:
Betty’s washing machine quit working so she called in a repairman.
Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, "I’ll leave the key under the mat. Fix the washing machine and leave the bill on the counter, and I’ll mail you a check.
"Oh, by the way don’t worry about my dog Spike. He won’t bother you. But, whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot!
“I MUST STRESS TO YOU: DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!”
When the repairman arrived at Betty’s house the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking dog he had ever seen. But, just as she had said, the dog just laid there on the carpet watching him go about his work.
The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing, and name-calling.
Finally, the repairman couldn’t contain himself any longer and yelled, “Shut up you stupid, ugly bird!”
To which the parrot replied, “Get him Spike!”
@Retro_Helix pissed myself you owe me some new pants 
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@Limiescouse Care to explain your follow Floridians?