The thread for jokes that don’t meet Flobs’ exacting standards

@PaulRoJo
Nice deflection.
Again, where did I wish he was dead?

Right, I really go around wishing common thieves would die.
:roll_eyes:

I mean, you’re the one who said it, and because of that common saying it was my assumption of what you meant as well.

We can only go off the words on the screen, I’ve no idea of your opinion on anything other than what appears here.

And @Dane seems pretty keen to verbal others. Weird.

Well just follow the lemmings and come to the worst conclusion.
My day will be unaffected.

Hope your day is going well.

It is, and I hope yours is too mate.

I read your post before anyone commented and my conclusion was the same as others due to what was said, no judgement either from me as honestly didn’t really think much of it.

Just wanted to clear up why people have drawn that conclusion, whether or not it was the intention.

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Thirsty spider!

Holy shitballs, the bickering!

Fella robs something from Apple store.
Goes over balcony in a failed attempt to escape.
Injures himself.
Fella on internet makes a comment lacking empathy, about a stranger on a video clip on the internet who is making a poor decision.

I will say empathy usually functions better when it is life on life, not in a thread like this, when commenting about strangers in a random video clip.

Be that as it may, it’s not worth the bickering!

Oh, and I hope the fella on the video uses the experience to course correct.

Use the Apple store on the 8th floor next time?

When my youngest lad was a student, living in accommodation halls, he got up one morning and in the communal kitchen a few of them shared, he made a cup of tea and a piece of toast in the toaster… took it back to his room… and as you do, when one piece has gone you inevitably feel like a second piece… He goes out and slots the bread in again, but he said there was this horrible smell, a real pungent make your eyes water type stink of stinks… So he puts the plug in the sink, thinking that will do the trick, especially if it is the smell of the sewers seeping back into the room… Pops his toast out, butters it, back to his room and continues to slurp the dregs of his tea… About an hour later, he goes back into the kitchen, by which time there were a couple of other students there having some breakfast… The vomit inducing stink was still hovering, so much so, each made a comment about how bad it was, he said it was like a fuzzy haze in the air you could almost see… lets get the caretaker down and get it sorted… the others moaned, bad for health blah blah and all that jazz…

An old guy about 90 turns up shortly after they made the complaint, with his little bag of tools for stripping down the drain under the sink… He walks into the kitchen, and before one of the students could start emptying the cupboard, the guy walks over to the toaster and takes a look inside… Obviously, followed his nose to the real cause of the smell. Looks into the slots, can’t see anything clearly, but was convinced the smell was coming out of the toaster… Unplugged it, and ragged out the crumb collection tray from the bottom… There it was… or what was left of it… a mouse…!

It had obviously crawled in at some point earlier in the week, got stuck, or got caught in the first of many rounds of people making their toast… because apparently, that was when this smell was first noticed, and had started to waft through the kitchen… burnt fur, burnt skin, burnt whiskers, and worse of all, a burnt tail that had come away from its body and was laying across the bottom of where the bread drops onto…
He said the three of them started throwing up immediately, well one started throwing up and the other two joined the club with him… The old guy held a handkerchief over his own nose and mouth in an attempt to keep his own last nights Chinese takeaway down.

Two other students came out of their rooms to see what the commotion was about, two girls… they immediately joined in the ‘throwing-up’ party… as they had used this one single toaster a few times during that week… What made me chuckle most when I heard about this, being students, being skint most of the time, being from another planet while they go through this phase of academia… they drew lots to see who got the task of cleaning the toaster out so they didn’t get charged for a new one from the complex manager… :0)
To this day, if I watch him out of the side of my eye, my lad still has a look inside the toaster before he makes himself some toast - he must be scarred for life :0)

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Good to see you get this back on track @RedOpium

My goto thread….

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Not like the police to get it wrong.

https://twitter.com/Sandford_Police/status/1658749172856520705

It’s a parody account…:rofl:

I know :innocent:

I follow this account and also RAF Luton. Both good for a laugh. :+1::nerd_face:

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