Kounde… 
Husband and wife return from their honeymoon. Both are not talking and are angry with each other. Husbands mate notices this and asks him what’s going on.
Husband tells him that after the first night, he left a $100 on his wife’s pillow in the morning. His mate tells him not to worry about it, after all, she couldn’t have expected him to save himself for her over all these years.
Husband says that that’s only half the problem. Mate looks confused and asks him what does he mean. Husband says that she left him $20 in change.
What?
He’s probably well versed in the prices
I think it goes back to “who gave you the 10p?”
Everyone.
It feels like a cultural tradition or custom, but I’ve no idea which one, and I kinda get the $20 in change being the punchline ptt references, but the significance of the $100 note baffles me.
The husband is used to sex workers that charge $100, so he left that for his new wife. But it turns out that she was only charging $80, so left him the $20 change.
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This only raises further questions for me, why the fuck is he leaving money out for his new wife like she’s a prostitute?
Not complicated really.
Habit.
He forgot the moment he was in.
I assume there are no aptitude tests for moderator status? 
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I took it to mean by getting change, he come up short…!
Most jokes rely on both the comic and the audience having a shared cultural experience. If that cultural knowledge isn’t held by both parties then the joke isn’t really going to work…
…or maybe it wasn’t particularly funny.
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Except for my jokes. They’re always fucking hilarious
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Actually typing this one, can’t be arsed with speach marks.
A panda escapes from the zoo (nicking £1000 in the process, clever panda)
He goes to a bar and meets a charming lady. They have a few drinks, go for dinner and check into a nice hotel.
After a good session, she says she’s going for a shower and that the panda owes her £100. Why he asks? I’m a prostitute she responds. Sorry, I don’t know what that means. There’s a dictionary on the shelf, look it up she says. With that she goes fr a shower.
When she came back, no panda. no money and a note on the pillow.
Look up panda
It said………….
Come on, anybody?
I think I’m more concerned about those who immediately understood the joke and found it relatable.
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“Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves.”
The version in the Lynne Truss book was somewhat more family friendly.
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This was the funniest part of the joke
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Both were so used to that lifestyle - husband sleeping with prostitutes and the wife being a prostitute, that they both forgot they were married and mistakenly exposed themselves to each other.
