The Manchester United Thread: That's It. That's the Joke (Part 1)

Klopp just wanted to let Ole keep his job a few more weeks. Brilliant guy

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:woozy_face:

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85M Harry tackling his own player :joy:

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Hadn’t seen this yet, despite all the chatter.

Oh my…how embarrassing for the young man…

Even worse, looked like a foul to me.

Can you give away a penalty by taking down your own player in the box? :joy:

Sadly I can’t really enjoy it, maybe I’ll be ok to enjoy the England game and Euro qualifiers on Thursday

Cavani will be 36 when his contract expires.

How many times did we see this at United? They still like their “proven” signing, big name. Not the first time if he flops.

I’m starting to call them Curriculum Vitae United FC.

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It’s official,Cavani has signed.

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Saying that… could be worse.

The Athletic:

Manchester United defender Brandon Williams was open to joining Southampton on loan in pursuit of games but the move now looks unlikely, report Dan Sheldon, Laurie Whitwell and David Ornstein.

Southampton have been in talks with the Old Trafford side over the 20-year-old’s availability, although Ole Gunnar Solskjaer is believed to have ruled out letting him go following Diogo Dalot’s move to AC Milan.

As part of the deal Manchester United wanted a clause included that set an agreement over the minimum number of games for Williams, but that is something Southampton can’t guarantee.

St Mary’s boss Ralph Hasenhuttl wanted Williams to come in and provide cover for Kyle Walker-Peters and Ryan Bertrand.

Southampton tried to sign him on loan in January as Bertrand was struggling, but failed in their attempts despite offering £25,000 per week in wages as part of the agreement, which at the time was a significant uplift for Williams.

Manchester United are in advanced talks to sign Facundo Pellistri from Penarol for a fee expected to reach £10 million and could also bring Atalanta’s Amad Traore to the club, reports Laurie Whitwell.

But a move for Ousmane Dembele looks unlikely with Barcelona demanding a permanent transfer and United only prepared to sanction a loan.

United are working on two deals for young wingers though. As revealed by The Athletic in July, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer has held talks with Diego Forlan, the former Penarol manager, about Pellistri, and the 18-year-old would initially head into the under-21s team.

United are attempting to complete a deal for Traore, regarded as an exciting talent in Serie A, having held discussions throughout the summer. Traore’s proposed loan move to Parma fell through and United have moved in. He is expected to join in January due to work permit issues.

Our weekend wasn’t exactly great, but:

A. If you’re going to get blown out, get blown out on the road, not at home.

…and more importantly:

B. After hearing about how Sancho was going to make them into title contenders, they’re officially not getting Sancho this window. :rofl:

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What a summer they’re having. :joy:

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The Athletic:

It’s understood that Watford value the 22-year-old at £45 million and want a minimum initial payment of £20 million for the deal to happen before the 11 pm deadline, with a further £15 million due next season and a final £10 million payment in 2022/23. It’s thought further add-ons may also be due subject to performance targets.

United are keen to get the deal done today so that they can include Sarr in their squad for the Champions League this season, the deadline set by UEFA is tomorrow – October 6th and therefore they wouldn’t be able to wait until the domestic transfer deadline on October 16th.

It has been suggested by sources close to the negotiations that United have turned down the only possibility of a loan deal which has been tabled by Watford which involved a £20 million fee being payable at the end of the 2020/21 season even if they didn’t want to keep him.

I’m loving watching Man Utd splutter along as much as the next Liverpool fan, but our 7-2 loss sort of takes the edge off it. Hopefully we bounce back and they continue to stumble.

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But utd are pretty much guaranteed to be fucking awful all of this season.

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Also we already have 9pts on the board

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Again Man U done desperate deals on deadline day. To be fair, signing on Cavani on deadline day is not as bad as them splashing some silly money on some new target after they have openly pursued Sancho the whole window. And Cavani is still a very very good player. But spending almost up to 50 mil on Diallo and that Uruguayan youth from Penarol, 2 18 year olds, could end up to be a masterstroke or another joke of how this club conducts its transfer business. But lets see, my feeling is that if Ole does not turn the result around by end Dec, he is gonna go.

It’s pretty clear to the rest of the world that Ed Woodward should step aside from making football decisions and appoint a DoF. I have been continually confounded by the fact that the one person it doesn’t appear clear to is Ed himself. Saw something that explains this, however, and it’s a lot to do with Ed’s ego.

“Woodward’s attachment with United dates back to advising the Glazers on their toxic takeover in 2005 and however many millions he has earned and the security he has under the Tampa siblings, Woodward is the footballing equivalent of the captain of the Titanic: the man behind the demise of Manchester United. He will be loath to going down with the ship.”

Basically, Ed wants to save his reputation, so — instead of stepping away from football matters with everyone knowing he’s incompetent — he’d rather stay in charge as to prove he’s not incompetent, thereby putting them further into the hole. Gotta love that ego. Long may it continue!

Also, hilariously no Sancho.

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No one is going sack themselves though are they.

No way, and that’s good news for us!

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