The Manchester United Thread: That's It. That's the Joke (Part 1)

Unless something major happens at United,like the club falling off a cliff and get relegated,profits totally dry up or someone else buys the club,Woodward isn’t going anywhere,he’s probably on good money so you can’t fault him for that,It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

The Glazers brought in Woodward so they aren’t going to sack him,aslong as they keep getting there £100mill+ a season out of the club’s profits,they couldn’t give a shit what the team is doing on the pitch.So i wouldn’t put all the blame on Woodward,he’s just a finance guy keeping the Glazers bank balance healthy and keeping himself in a job,luckily for us he’s fucking clueless about football.

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100% in agreement that he wouldn’t walk away from a cash cow, but also a little perplexed as to why he might not agree to hire a DoF? Wouldn’t he still be able to retain his post as chief exec even if not as involved on the transfer side of things?

Again, I could give a shit - I love that he’s just getting them further into the mud - but it is quite amazing I must say.

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Timely article, which for the sake of argument I shall title Ed’s Greatest (S)hits:

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I know it probably wouldn’t matter much to the finances at United if Ed brought in a DoF,so i’d probably say it’s more down to him not wanting one,cos in his head he’s probably thinking he’s undermining himself and making it look like he can’t do the job on his own (or give the fans more ammunition against him).

Right now he’s in full control of the club on a daily basis,the cash,the staff,players and transfers,he probably thinks that bringing in a DoF will give him headaches,over time the DoF will probably be knocking on his door every transfer window wanting to spend money Ed might not want to spend then arguements will kick in,DoF will walk and tell the press the cunt won’t let him do his job properly and bring in the right players,that kinda thing,i’m probably full of shit but thats what i reckon/hoping is going on.

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I dont think there is any machivelian scheme, they just arent very good. You can only put in a good structure, if you understand what that looks like and you can identify the right people to head up the roles. This has never been what this guy is good at. Let’s not forget that he has sounded out the likes of Rio to take this job.

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I loved the 2013 story about people pretending to represent United…brings back memories of me posting this on TIA

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Seven years after Sir Alex Ferguson tipped him to become the greatest player in Man United’s history, Phil Jones has been left out of their 25-man UCL squad at the age of 28.

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Amazed it’s taken them that long, actually.

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tbf Jones’s are extremely likeable and very very funny,hard to get annoyed at.

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Its hard to keep up with them.

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You’ve got to be pretty bad considering what’s ahead of him, maybe it’s the fate that awaits Maguire.

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GET OFF THE STAGE!!!

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How could you get annoyed at a face like this…

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That Phil Jones gif is amazing, fucking hilarious.

However, something has been bugging me since I first saw it…

Can someone please explain WTF is going on in this one??

PJones

That shit ain’t right…

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I think he is reacting to someone singing Rock a Bye Baby

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BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Baby RUTH!!!

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Alright…play nice…

What is he actually worth? What would Utd ask for, what would RM pay?

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HEY YOU GUYYYYYYYYYYYYS!

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It’s his impression of Phil Neville,imo it’s pretty good.

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