Once I was at a pub when a woman a few feet away from me sneezed.
Her glass eye came out & rolled along the bar. I caught it & handed it back to her. She rinsed it in water & popped it back in, thanking me. We went back to our own drinks.
As she’s getting ready to leave she comes up to me & hands me a piece of paper with her number on it.
I thought she must be mistaken so I asked, “Who, me?”
She said “Yes. I don’t usually do this kind of thing but you caught my eye.”
Brilliant, so good to have a little chuckle at something at the end of a long day, thanks Koptician
Thank you kind sir! We can all do with a bit of a chuckle, especially in these trying times
My mantra when out and about is give a smile and get a smile, although there are funny buggers that won’t even look at you.
My friend, you just made me smile.
And always smile away. It adds up. Despite the media and news telling us otherwise, we are here to take care of each other. You have no idea how important that smile of yours midget be for someone.
“Dad, what’s the difference between confident and confidential?”.
“Well, you’re my son. I’m confident of that, and your friend Jimmy next door is also my son, but that’s confidential”.
Dying 
That’s BAAAAD man, but not in a bad way 
:0)
Caithness is famous for nicknames some Classic ones .
“I knew a guy who had one hand bigger than the other and they call him " The Clock".”
“Had a teacher with a twitch in his eye he was known as indicator.”
“A lad from up the coast called Gerry had heart surgery and they nicknamed him “ Gerry and the Pacemaker”.”
“A pub I once worked in had a local called "Joe Malone " when his wife died he became "Home Alone”.”
“I know a lad in Lybster. He’s tall and thin so they call him 6 O’clock”
“Knew a lad once who got engaged 3 times. He was known as Lord of the Rings”
“Heard of a lad called "pothole " everyone used to try and avoid him”
“Heard of a lad called Enda May. People just called him June!”
“Know a lad that went to Australia on a years visa and was back a week later!! Called him boomerang”
“Lad in town here known as “Bomb Scare” as soon as he comes in the pub empties…”
“Guy in our school, Peter, was held back a year for failing all his exams. He became known as RE-Peter”
“Heard of a guy that used to wear the same coat all the time so his friends called him Dulux…cos he only needed one coat”
“I knew a lad that had only 4 fingers on one hand he was called kit kat”
“Our local drug dealer delivers so quick - we call him instagram”