The Manchester United Thread: That's It. That's the Joke (Part 1)

When did this thread went from banter to compassion? Are we really trying to suggest what would improve them right now :joy:

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Don’t be silly.

Hendo would never step in dog shit.

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He was an average defender even when they inexplicably paid £80m for him. Since coming back from injury he looks like someone who just forgot how to play football. After this trauma I’d be unsurprised if he never returned to his best , which was never that great anyway.

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Hear hear!!!

I made the exact same comment on YT yesterday. There were at least half a dozen, ‘I’m a Liverpool fan and you need to do this…’

WTF?!?! All we need to do is laugh.

That’s it.

The end.

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Some good shouts at fixing Man Utd. With some pruning under a proper football manager, with better coaching to a system, accompanied by an overhaul of their recruitment so it feeds into the whole project instead of random shiny baubles being purchased, then yes, it is very doable.

Let’s start with a top manager. Who? The best are taken… Klopp, Guardiola, Tuchel, Simeone, Pochettino, Nagelsmann. So they need someone from the next tier down.

Conte would come in and have some necessary fights to get them ship shape… but he would also have some unnecessary fights to undermine them. He might be the one they go for, but I think it will be wrong.

Zidane might be persuaded. He has got the name and his pedigree is excellent, but obviously there are strong suspicions that he coincided with a peak Real Madrid to win stuff, but didn’t actually build anything, and Man Utd need a manager who can build something.

Brendan Rodgers? Arguably he is biding his time waiting for one of the Manchester jobs to become available. Not sure if he would get the call, but he would definitely be much better than Solksjaer. Would he have the spine to take on the dressing room and gain control? He is a good coach. Has he matured enough to not feel threatened when others speak into the recruitment side of things?

It’s a big ask to get the manager right, and I don’t see anyone out there who is better than what Man Utd’s rivals already have. Then their recruitment is a shambles, the coaching not so good, and of course the owners continue to hollow them out from within.

My considered take is that while is seems like they could be fixed with a couple of good decisions, they are in fact going to have to endure two decades on the edge of the big time looking in, jealously.

I think they are already 6-7 years into their wilderness years, and like all Liverpool fans I am loving it!

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I think I speak for all Liverpool fans when I say I’m gutted to hear the rumours coming out of their dressing room that the players have had it with him and it might be enough to sway the board into action.

Gary Neville seemed pretty sure last night that he would be safe 'til the end of the season , but what does everyone else think ?

Is he for the chop , and if so , is it likely to be imminent ?

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My guess is they are talking to Conte, and realizing that his expectations are not compatible with what they want to do. Conte left Inter because the club would not make the changes he believed were needed, and would not give him the control to do so. That was largely due to financial reasons, so less of a direct constraint at ManU, but he is going to want security and control, and Conte will simply not be interested in working with such a bizarre squad. ManU want someone to get them a CL spot this season, with this team.

The Ronaldo signing is everything that is wrong with them in a nutshell. Big name, good scorer, not remotely what they needed but a feel-good story for their fans, now one more problem for their manager.

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I think they should chop him, as he’s not up to the job.
If player power has swayed that, it is definitely an et tu brute moment, as he has tried to protect and support the players, even if he has been out of his depth.

I’m not sure who they will go for, but there are big question marks whatever way they look.

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One of the most significant things to hurt them this season has been the let the game flow rule.

Leaving aside the ridiculous amount of penalties won by them, they are now not getting the many cheap freekicks, the Bruno rolling around trick is now less likely to pay dividends, etc

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Oh My God Omg GIF by CBC

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Role Playing Reaction GIF by Hyper RPG

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I’m loving the new rule. Watching all those entitled cunts rolling around in despair whining while play is waved on around them. Oh the joy !

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I honestly thought they might stick with him for a short while yet. At least to see if anything improves or at least get a better judge on whether top 4 is really at risk or not. I suspect that’s all that really matters to them, CL football with a decentish run in the competition.

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There’s a poll on the Red Caf. We could invade it and “set the record straight” if we’re allowed on there again.

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Maybe he gets the next run of games , but with Spurs , City , Chelsea and Arsenal looming you could potentially see them losing all four and being right out of contention.

But they sure sell a lot of CR7 kit to line their own pockets!

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Ouch. Article mentioned exactly what has been discussed in here.

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Fuck it. We’ve paid enough attention to them. They’re irrelevant now.

With or without Ole. Hope they get humilated even more by Spurs and Atalanta and then maybe get something against City.

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I fucking love how hard the Guardian has been going at Utd.

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fuck them…they did more than enough wanking over