And whoever said you can’t trust the media. Always rely on the beeb to get straight to the cold hard facts.
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My favorite has to be
After every game, the Reds are given a special, mineral drink which enhances their performance, ‘Sport Bild’ reports. Ex-swimmer Mark Warnecke created the beverage.
So we use a drink to help improve our perfornces AFTER our games???
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Yes, the effects are retrospective. Amazing. 
I knew that this stuff was pretty powerful, but damn, that is a new whole level of powerful
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My walking football team came back from 3-0 down to win 4-3 yesterday. I’d better have one of those drinks sharpish to explain our performance.
The Reds players obviously never had those drinks after the Spurs, Leicester, West Ham and Brentford away games though? I mean, how else can you explain the dropped points? 
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That concoction is even more potent than the “morning after” pill. 
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They didn’t as those stocks were nicked by Peppy when he ran out of coke. 
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It was Alice!
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Coming from fans of a team who were awarded a pen and won after the game.
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So after having a slab in defence is not enough, they now want to sign a wooden plank.
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I am actually a bit surprised that Ajax didn’t have some kind of clause preventing Ten Hag raiding their players for a certain period after exit.
Timber doesn’t have the size or physicality to play in the PL. he’s only 20 though, so I guess he could bill up a bit.
The issue is they do t have any leaders at the back. Maguire as captain is a joke, Varane is not a leader, none of their FBs are leaders and Lindelof certainly isn’t.
They should be all over Tarkowski on a free, he’d bring a bit of physicality and toughness to their backline, but they won’t do it because they’ll see an ex Burnley player as beneath them. Some of our best business was done raiding relegated teams’ best players. Guys like Robbo and Gini come to mind, but other shrewd signings like Matip, Shaqiri, and Minamino have been able to have some measure of success despite coming from what might be considered as lowly teams. Difference is they were brought in as part of an overall team vision for the on-field product, not as commercial assets.
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A 1.79 meter CB, what could possible go wrong …
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Nobody gives a f*ck when there’s shouts of timberrrr?
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They know that they can make money. Ajax can continue promoting their youth and still dominate the dutch league even if they slip up a couple of years.
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I wonder how Ajax will do in the PL, I guess we will find out.
I think Ajax are in a position where they need to allow players to move on each summer regardless, so there is little point in having a clause that would limit the competition for your players and with it reduce the potential fee you could bring in.
Ajax are built to sell players. Their manager going to Utd and then them getting inflated Utd fees for those players who were going to leave to go somewhere is their dream scenario.
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Scenes when they end up with Davy Klassen and Van de Beek in midfield instead of De Jong.