What's happening?

[legalalien]

@aussielad

So people?

Well, according to some French bloke, hell is other people.

[Semmy]

I hear ya. Ex and I did an 11mth honeymoon travelling SE Asia and Aussie. trip of a lifetime, etc. There are certain things in my life that immediately remind me of her (and my wife doesn’t let me forget it)

there’s bits and pieces of my life that remind me of that time, but I’ve long since left that behind. Can’t cling to the past it holds you back.

[cynicaloldgit]

Exactly. You will never forget previous relationships, but you have to treat new ones as completely separate entities. It’s fatal to compare your new partner to former ones… there’s only one way that ends.

[tesh]

Fundamentally is there a difference between a Liverpool fanboi and a spaceship fanboi?

[koptician]

Yeah, and for that I’m grieving the loss of her and that relationship. I didn’t know myself that I had blacked away so much pent up emotion. A very painful but necessary experience.

[Maria]

https://twitter.com/Chris_Chambo_/status/1751256527594217718?t=PmB4Jvf7T3FmI-IJDORx4A&s=19

Hope all are okay in the surrounding area.

[Wilkored08]

Is it near the bitters new ground…

[RedWhippet]

Apparently it’s the Fox Street development (or not development- the company went bust 5 years ago)

Large blaze causes huge plume of smoke over Liverpool

I think it’s the one you can see from the Wallasey tunnel if you are heading towards the city centre.

This has insurance job written all over it.

[WooltonRed]

@RedWhippet

This has insurance job written all over it.

It’s Goodison Park then.

[Sithbare]

@Rambler

Having spent 2 weeks in India recently I guess I should not have been shocked at the poverty but it even exceeded my expectations…

My guide was excellent and we had some frank discussions about Indian society. I was amazed that he defended the caste system and arranged marriage on several occasions pointing out the “advantages”. I was very surprised that the caste system was still very much a thing. One day I was confined to the hotel with “stomach issues” and had a long discussion with a consultant surgeon from Kolkata who also praised it and proudly told me on several occasions that he was a Brahmin touching his head

I don’t have a negative impression on arranged marriages. Neither do I have a positive impression on it. There have been arranged marriages which have failed and there have been ones which have succeeded. I guess the same goes for any marriage.

Having spent time in North India , I can say that casteism exists more there as compared to south India (where I’m from). Doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist in south India , it does, but not nearly to the same extent.

I’m not for disparaging north India but areas of North India (including large parts of Bengal / Bihar / UP / Rajasthan / MP / Guj) are pretty backward in comparision to the areas in South India both in terms of education , jobs , standard of living and it shows.

I think the main resentment w.r.t Indian society is the reservation system. The continuance of that system is one of the reasons why there’s such enemity among people and also why the feelings of casteism persist.

I do get the reasons why the reservation system should continue but that’s me and my opinion as a “upper caste” hindu is in the minority. The system does need to be revamped and be something not based on political considerations though.

[gasband]

In my opinion, cultural homogeneity will never happen unless with governmental intervention. If people are not forced to, they will continue living and doing what or who they are comfortable with. That’s why when migrants go to a new country, they will live in a place where most of their own people are. Soon enclaves will form and people wonder why they don’t bother to integrate. So in such a big country, it’s almost impossible for the people to resolve their own cultural norms and inequity cos there is no incentive to for those benefitting and no means to for those at the bottom

[Sithbare]

Wife’s just got her second wisdom tooth extracted.

Having 4 days of peace with her not being able to shout at me.

Sheer bliss.

[Bekloppt]

Millions of people adapt and integrate into new and different societies. You don’t have to completely take on every aspect of a culture, but over generations migrants become part of the fabric of the place they’ve moved to.
I’ve seen that time and time again.

[Sithbare]

@gasband

In my opinion, cultural homogeneity will never happen unless with governmental intervention. If people are not forced to, they will continue living and doing what or who they are comfortable with. That’s why when migrants go to a new country, they will live in a place where most of their own people are. Soon enclaves will form and people wonder why they don’t bother to integrate. So in such a big country, it’s almost impossible for the people to resolve their own cultural norms and inequity cos there is no incentive to for those benefitting and no means to for those at the bottom

I do with both you and @Bekloppt

But it’s not about the first generation immigrants and their assimilation. Or even the second generation immigrants. The third generation immigrants will assimilate themselves into the greater society more.

You need to have time have its say. And it’s not as if the immigrants do forget their roots.

[Sithbare]

@gasband

In my opinion, cultural homogeneity will never happen unless with governmental intervention. If people are not forced to, they will continue living and doing what or who they are comfortable with

In India’s case , the government did intervene to promote equality. The execution of that could have been better though.

[gasband]

I agree to a certain extent but from what we experienced here, there are groups of people who are far more resistant to integration if they can choose not to. Even in a small country like Singapore, our history has shown that when left alone enclaves start to happen and that’s culminated into deadly racial wars. As I mentioned, there are groups of people we see who moved here and a few generations down are as local as they can be but yet we see alot more, even “locals” who have had generations here, still gravitating towards their own kind whether by race or religion. Not saying there is one right way, but I am glad in a small country like this, I was “forced” to live with Malay and Indian neighbours, go to kindergarten with them, go to school with them, celebrate each other festivities in close proximity and truly understood the beauty of racial diversity, tolerance and acceptance.

[gasband]

@Sithbare

You need to have time have its say. And it’s not as if the immigrants do forget their roots.

Time can only have it’s say when you make meaningful steps and policies that over time will mature and results seen in society. Letting nature takes its course might not always have positive results or beneficial ones. Integration does not mean forgetting our roots, in fact we celebrate it more knowing we have neighbours who embraced them like we do. Over here, even as English was the method of delivery in Classes, we are all required to learn our mother tongue, it was compulsory. Certain religion are given time off during business hours to go pray, this was required of businesses. So forced integration while it can sound arbitrary or "oh great government interference’, but in my case, it has done alot of good of course like you all said when executed well.

[Sithbare]

@gasband

Time can only have it’s say when you make meaningful steps and policies that over time will mature and results seen in society. Letting nature takes its course might not always have positive results or beneficial ones. Integration does not mean forgetting our roots, in fact we celebrate it more knowing we have neighbours who embraced them like we do. Over here, even as English was the method of delivery in Classes, we are all required to learn our mother tongue, it was compulsory. Certain religion are given time off during business hours to go pray, this was required of businesses. So forced integration while it can sound arbitrary or "oh great government interference’, but in my case, it has done alot of good of course like you all said when executed well.

That’s been pretty much the case with India. The problem is that the politicians exploit all sets of people for their gain.

[koptician]

As human beings who all grew in varying degrees in less than ideal family scenarios, we are all somewhat “broken”

Discovering through self-education, coaching, and therapy. I grew up in a very dysfunctional household. My parents are still married. However I’d challenge you to find out another 40+ year old marriage that has involved more screaming and shouting from day one.

I have something that’s now called childhood ptsd. I have mild to severe (depending on circumstances) emotional disregulation. I literally feel the pain of grief in my lungs, my sternum, and my right clavicle. It’s got a neurological component.

I have the anxious attachment style and tend to unknowingly gravitate towards equally (but differently) damaged partners. My three significant relationships have all been to ladies who had their own trauma growing up and it manifested differently from mine.

The good news is, now that I know, I can work towards training my mind to become more whole and resilient.

But it’s not going to be easy to deprogram half a lifetime worth of conditioning.

[Dane]

@cynicaloldgit

Exactly. You will never forget previous relationships, but you have to treat new ones as completely separate entities. It’s fatal to compare your new partner to former ones… there’s only one way that ends.

Said it for years, if heaven forbid me and the missus were ever to separate, the absolute last thing I’d do would be to get tied into another relationship.